Have you ever thought to yourself “imagine if I just had a little more time?” From here we start to daydream about everything that we can possibly achieve if only there were a few more hours in the day or if we had special people in our lives who found the ultimate joy in cooking, cleaning, washing and completing all of the necessary paperwork that comes with every day living. Pffffft, I do not have that person who lives to do any of these things! Does this person even exist?
Do you ever have one of those dreams that really do seem like reality. You know those dreams where you do have time, you are in your dream role in life, you have found your purpose, your passion and you are living the dream (also probably with perfect hair and lip gloss on) only to wake up and realize……Geeze Louise…yep it was just a dream…..Bugger! And your mascara is smudged and you have panda eyes…..
So what is it that you do??? At first it may be a bit disappointing but then you start to get excited and although you understand that it was really just a dream you decide to ask Dr Google or even perhaps scroll through Facebook..(yikes) for the ultimate answer!
After all this is our life and we should be able to follow our passion and our dreams, I mean there are thousands of people doing just that so why not us!
WHY NOT US? WHY NOT YOU? Sorry to scream it out in capitals….but why not??? What is the answer to any of this if you know that at the end of the day you just don’t have time to do any of it?
Well, I want to share with you my take on it. I can really only speak for myself because I’m not an expert on the matter, I can only tell you what I have found personally.
So my story goes like this. I decided this year that my life would be different because I gave this year a word. A word that I would think about every day and study the meaning of and to really start to engage with. My word for this year is “balance”
I chose this word because time and balance has always been a struggle for me and for years and years I have wanted more time and I wanted the result to be one of complete balance.
Did I have time for me? NO Did I have time to take a breath? NO Did I feel a bit sorry for myself?
NO Well actually yes I did feel a bit sorry for myself because I wanted to know why other people had got this balance thing right! It wasn’t as though I was crying in foetal position on the ground, I just felt a bit deflated that I was soooo time poor.
Then something happened, it all came to me after all of these years. I could just scream because I was chasing “balance” for so long until I came to the realization that there is no such thing!!! Yep, that’s the reality people, there is no..such…thing…as…balance…..
If I go out for a sneaky half strength latte, I lose and hour or so on my book work. If I zip out to a networking event, I lose the evening with my family…and so on and so on and so on. What’s really hilarious about all of this is that, now I don’t look for balance and I have found ME time because I no longer have any expectations of the “lost balance”.
As for living the dream, following the passion and finding your purpose…..we delay all of these things because we are looking for balance, but we are also looking for perfection. As the ultimate control freak (which is possibly the best type of cool freak there is by the way) I would strive for the ultimate perfection and have trouble moving forward. After all, if it’s not perfect it would be ridiculous to move forward…wouldn’t it?
Why do you think this is? Is this you? No…stop for a minute and just think about it. Do you make a million excuses as to why you can’t??? You can’t start a business, take the dance lessons, art lessons, do the garden…you can’t make a moment to just be with YOU?
OH…I can already hear you through my computer screen saying…..”but I really don’t have time”, ” I really need to have a better set up” ……blah blah blah…what I am hearing is myself because I have been right at this very place.
When I was looking for perfection, I was really running from the fear. If I don’t get it right, what will people think? What if I fail? What if I do it wrong? what what what what what if???
Well…I’m here to tell you people that the word perfection has lost me too these days! At least what I thought the definition of perfection was to me.
If you fall over, you get back up..you did it as a child you can do it now. After all you’re stronger and tougher and for goodness sake, the only one standing in your way is YOU. If there is a problem, YOU are the solution, no one else…just YOU!
I have decided NOT to chase perfection….I have decided that there is no one else in the world like me so I don’t actually wish to be anyone else. I don’t need to be any of the perfect people I see on the internet that appear to have the perfect life.
I feel so freaking connected to my passion and my purpose that nothing can stand in my way. My old definition of perfection has changed because now I am living my dream because I no longer have the fears about what will go wrong. I do know that if I hit a bump or something isn’t right that I will remember the experience and move on better than I did before. This is the absolute best way to nail it…by having a little stumble and learning the better way to tackle it.
So what’s in it for you? EVERYTHING…….
I’m thanking my lucky stars (no perhaps the stars are not lucky because maybe I am just taking charge) that I am understanding that when you give up one thing to do another it’s okay and when you just go for it…get in there and tackle that soul deep desire that wakes you in the night…before trying to find “perfection” you can celebrate that you have made it this far. You can celebrate that you are magnificent. And no, saying this doesn’t mean you’re up yourself, it means that you just feel bloody satisfied that you are living your passion and that you have taken the first brave steps to continue the walk into a life where you have purpose…not balance and not perfection but true self magnificence. Actually while we’re being completely honest….by taking a good long hard look at who you are “honestly” you should also add “breathtaking”, “astounding” and “proud”…proud of yourself for seeing yourself for who you really are.
Now go, go out there and stop looking for so much balance and stop looking for perfection. These things can only hold you back and consolidate the fear of doing what you were born to do.
Be freaking fabulous and don’t hold back….share your stories with me. I want to hear ALL of it, every single bit. This is only the beginning……